10 Rules of Swinging Parties

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Thursday 19 July 2012

Whether you are experienced Swingers or a new couple venturing out into the Swinging world, eventually you will be invited to a Swingers Party. These are great fun, and a fantastic way to meet local Swingers, as well as those that are visiting your area. Ideally at this stage you would be signed up to a Swinger’s Social Network that has a decent mapping feature. This tool will prove invaluable when it comes to tracking down those elusive Swinging Parties and events.

Here are ten basic rules that you and your partner should follow when attending Swinging parties. Swingers tend to be fun, easy going people, however a little bit of effort ensures that things go that little bit smoother.

Stick Together

Be sure to arrive and leave the party as a couple. Swinging is a couple’s activity, and is much more comfortable and easier if you act like one. It also looks odd when couples walk through the door and split (i.e. it looks like they just turned up together to get into the swinging party and are not really a couple). If you or your partner is not sure about swinging yet check out our Swinging and your relationship page.

RSVP to Invites

Be sure to RSVP well in advance – Swinger Parties are a bit more sensitive than ‘vanilla’ (meaning regular/normal) ones when it comes to having the right mix, so be sure to inform the host of your intentions. This is also another place where your Swinger’s Social Network comes in, Does it allow you to check who the attendes are going to be? Can you check those attendees validations? Feel free to touch base with other Swingers that are attending, it’s great when you turn up and know who you want to meet/have had a chat before.

Be Punctual

Needless to say, walking in 2 hours late mid way through the ‘action’ is a turn-off and can be quite off-putting, both to the newbies, as well as the experienced. It can also cause people to feel uncomfortable as you might not know each other. Different crowds have different ways for structuring their events, some swingers like to walk in through the door and jump in straight to the action. Others like to chat, have drinks and loosen up a bit. Timing is essential, as you want to ensure that everyone is comfortable with each other.

Bring a Gift

Ask the host what you should take along with you – this might be something simple like a bottle of wine. If they insist you bring nothing, surprise them with a kinky set of underwear for the lady., some toys for the other guests or another simple gesture. This is a great way to make sure that you get other invites from the Swingers at this party.

Be Courteous

Being nice to people is of paramount importance if your pants are going to hit the floor later. Treat people just like you would like them to treat you. Be sensible, considerate and understanding. Don’t be pushy, just because its a swinging party it doesn’t mean that everyone is out to bang everybody. Then again, you are more likely to be approached if the person in question knows they can back out easily should they need to.

Dress Properly

If the party is a themed one, dress the part. You’re all going to be naked by the end of the night so don’t feel embarrassed to wear skimpy clothes. Swingers throw some of the best theme parties EVER, so might as well enjoy this aspect of the lifestyle as much as possible. Always make an effort and try buy something for the occasion, there is nothing worse for a host than spending time, effort and money to organise a swinger’s party and having guests turn up in costumes cobbled together from old clothes.

Hygiene and Grooming

Swingers tend to somewhat obsessive about this, A swinger with bad breath or BO is not going to get very far. Be sure to shower and groom well. Body hair is also usually trimmed/shaved (this goes for men as well as women).

Have Fun

Swinging is fun! Do whatever makes you happy, and don’t let yourself be pressured into something you don’t want to do. Be open to acting out your fantasies as well as those of others, whilst remaining in your comfort zone. Don’t be selfish, and ‘give’ as much as you take (they’re called Swinging parties not Blow Job parties for a reason boys). Avoid getting totally sloshed, and maintain a semi semblance of having your wits about you, nothing ruins a good party like having someone pass out.

The Right to say ‘NO’

Swinging is only ok as long as everyone is cool with whats going on. If something makes you uncomfortable just say so. Likewise, is someone declines, take it at face value and don’t push. Sometimes people take time to warm to you, other times, they may want to observe new Swingers from a distance prior to ‘moving in’ on them.


Be open and friendly to everyone, even if you don’t want to take things further with them. Swinging is all about networking, so being nice to everyone is good way of making new friends and building a good reputation. The Swinging lifestyle can be a fickle one at time, and a faux-pas in your early stages can cause damage that might take a while to undo.